Pursuing Happier-ness: Insights for Living

Happiness is a universal pursuit transcending age, culture, and socioeconomic status. However, what makes us truly happy is a question that has fascinated philosophers, psychologists, and thought leaders for centuries. In this post, we will explore the wisdom of two prominent figures, Simon Sinek and Arthur Brooks, who have shared valuable insights on happiness. By the end of this quick read, you will have five key takeaways and actionable steps to help you along the journey toward a happier and more fulfilling life.

1) Find Your "Why" - Simon Sinek

A renowned author and motivational speaker, Simon Sinek believes that finding your "why" is essential for lasting happiness. He suggests your "why" represents your purpose, core values, and the reason you get out of bed every morning. It is something that you are passionate about, gives you energy when engaging in it, and has a positive influence on those around you. What is that for you? What is your "Why"?

  • Take some time to reflect on your life's purpose. What activities or causes give you a sense of fulfillment? Write down your "why." Then, reflect on your weekly engagement around your "why." What, if anything, needs to change?

2) Prioritize Relationships - Arthur Brooks

Arthur Brooks, a social scientist and author, emphasizes the importance of human connections in pursuing happiness. He routinely states that happiness is not a destination but a journey. It is a complex, adaptive thing that requires an awareness of the balance of positive and negative affect in our lives and figuring out what lever we need to pull when negativity is out of balance. Whether introverted or extroverted, we must realize that solid relationships with family, friends, or colleagues contribute significantly to our overall well-being. 

Happiness hygiene is not about endless or toxic positivity but perhaps an increased awareness of our traits, emotions, and experiences and how that influences our actions and decisions in life. It is also essential to recognize that we need negative experiences to develop resilience to become stronger. Life is not all positive, and when it is not, can we take the time to understand how we are being challenged and embrace the opportunity to grow?

  • What is your balance? Assess the average level of your negative and positive affect. Those who tend to have a higher negative affect recognize that happiness isn't often too low but that the high level of negative affect remains unchecked.

3) Embrace Gratitude - Simon Sinek

Simon Sinek encourages practicing gratitude as a powerful tool for happiness. Being thankful for what you have, rather than focusing on what you lack, can transform your perspective. He challenges you to reflect on your reverse bucket list – focusing more on what you have accomplished or experienced in life rather than a list of things yet to be attained. This focus shift doesn't diminish goal setting or drive but ensures grateful awareness and celebration of achievement.

  • Take 5. Take 5 minutes to reflect and write down your life's events, experiences, and achievements. If you need help getting started, open your photo library on your phone or computer and use the images to trigger memories. What (or who) comes to mind? Reflect. Reach out.

4) Pursue Meaningful Work - Arthur Brooks

Arthur Brooks believes that the complex simplicity of happiness includes love, relationships, faith, family, and work that matters. That meaning is built of coherence (why things happen the way they do), purpose (direction and life goals), and significance (does it matter). And that many who struggle with finding meaningful work may also struggle from a meaning crisis. Regardless, recognize that engaging in meaningful work is crucial to happiness. Finding a job or career that aligns with your values and passions can lead to a sense of purpose and contentment.

  • Meaning Crisis? Consider the following two questions: Why are you alive? For what would you be willing to die for today?

  • Meaningful Work? Reflect on your current job or career path. Does it align with your values and interests? If not, consider what steps you can take to achieve more fulfilling work.

5) Give Back - Simon Sinek

Simon Sinek emphasizes the significance of giving back to others. Acts of kindness and service benefit those you help and provide a deep sense of fulfillment and happiness. Too often, we allow daily activities to become a hamster wheel that exhausts us without providing fulfillment for ourselves or service to others. Create margin. Make service a priority.

  • Volunteer your time or skills to a cause you care about. Whether mentoring, volunteering at a local charity, or helping a neighbor, giving back can be a source of joy.

Happiness is not an elusive concept but a complex and adaptive state that requires daily pursuit. It is not a destination to reach, but a journey of balance sought. Though enlightened by thought leaders like Simon Sinek, Arthur Brooks, and others, the above insights are proverbial. Finding our "why," prioritizing relationships, embracing gratitude, pursuing meaningful work, and giving back can unlock the door to a happier and more fulfilling life. Happier-ness is worth pursuing. Start with these actionable steps today, and watch as your happier-ness and well-being flourish.

Bret NicksComment